InsomniaZ ™ : บล๊อกเบลอๆ ของคนนอนไม่หลับ

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If you are a manager, chances are you may at some point want to step into a leadership role. Making the step from managing to leading is one of the biggest steps that you will make in your career. So what can you do to develop your leadership skills so that you step into the role ready for success?

Sign up for a leadership development programme

One option is to sign up for a formal year long leadership development programme. Many large organisations now have their own programme for their aspiring leaders or have a programme delivered on their behalf by an external organisation.

Attend workshops

These might range from half a day to three days in length. The key is to find a workshop that has more of a bias towards application. The theory is useful to know but the real learning comes from putting things into place in a safe environment.

Work on a project

Organisations are regularly setting up project teams or task forces to either take something to launch, upgrade or update something already in existence or solve a problem. Being part of these projects not only broadens your knowledge but also develops your communications, team working and networking skills.

Take a secondment

If you are working in a specialist field, there may be real benefit to going on a secondment to a different part of the business to get new experience. Just be careful that the secondment is going to give you exposure to areas that will be beneficial to you in the longer term.

Shadow someone more senior

Shadowing can be hugely valuable in getting an insight into what life is really like at a senior level. Most director level people will be open to you shadowing them as part of your self-development.

Find a mentor

Find yourself a mentor who has done what you aspire to do and is someone who is committed to helping others achieve

The bottom line

There are many opportunities open to you to develop your leadership skills. The key is to find the combination that will have greatest impact on you achieving success.

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This is the third and final article in a series I wrote about raising happy diabetic kids. While Juvenile Diabetes makes this job tougher the information in these articles applies to raising any child. Diabetic children aren’t any different from other children. Their pancreas just doesn’t work. However, the emotional toll that diabetes takes on a child, even when blood glucose levels are under fairly good control, must be taken into account whenever we consider what is best for them. We can be very helpful in raising children who are emotionally strong and better able to avoid and overcome these stresses brought on by diabetes by making sure they are raised with a strong foundation of these three basic life skills. Self-Confidence, Self-Reliance, and Self-Control.

It All Starts With Discipline:

In order for our children to develop self-control it is our responsibility to teach them discipline. Discipline is the part of raising our children that causes us the most sleeplessness. It’s probably also the part that a lot of parents don’t think they get quite right. The thoughts of the “experts” have changed so much that the “old fashioned” discipline we were taught and what has become the so-called “permissive” new tradition are so far apart several things generally happen. We ignore what we were taught, or we ignore the new conventional wisdom, or we become confused and don’t carry out our responsibilities properly. I’m as guilty of this confusion from time to time as anybody else is. When you think about it discipline should have three goals.

It must pave the way for our children to acquire Self-Control or self-discipline.

It must be applied in such a way as to allow our children to also develop self-confidence and self-reliance.

Parents must be comfortable with implementing it and feel it works.

The old fashioned “thou shalt not” style discipline and the new permissive style lead to two completely different outcomes in children. With the old fashioned style we end up with children who don’t learn to make choices or decisions well for themselves. They find acceptance only if they “do as they are told” and it teaches them in turn to exert power and control over others. On the other hand with a permissive style of discipline our children have too many choices and never know where they really stand. This can lead to insecurity. (and low self-esteem) Our children get used to having their own way and they learn to negotiate and manipulate. We only step in when the behavior goes too far. It always goes to far, they’re kids.

How To Develop Self-Control:

By raising our children within a framework of proper discipline we encourage self-control in them. We aren’t going to be the boss forever. We are teaching our children to be responsible for themselves. There are three main components to Self-Control. They are habit (hanging up their coat when they come in or doing homework before watching TV), seeing the greater good (doing without something right now in order to get something better later), and the ability to make moral judgments (doing things just because it’s the right thing to do). We need to teach our children to think ahead about the consequences of their actions. They should also be taught to accept responsibility for what they do. They need to be taught to make proper rules and to stick to them.

Our kids need to learn to accept disappointment. And also to trust their own judgment. When children learn to see what needs to be done, stick with it until it is done, and not do it just because someone told them to or because they know it will make us happy, then we can pat ourselves on the back.

This is our goal in teaching our children good diabetes control. It will help them realize not only that they have to do it but that they should do it. We as parents of diabetic children have been entrusted with a very difficult and special task. By holding up our end of the responsibility for helping our children develop self-confidence, self-reliance, and self-control, we are preparing them to grow into adults that number one can and will take proper care of their health. And will in turn raise the next generation of happy kids, our grandchildren.

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If you want to increase your happiness, one way is through nurturing your character strengths. Positive psychology has identified 24 strengths which can be divided into 6 distinct virtues. All of these strengths can be developed. A great deal of research has gone into looking into these strengths and how they can benefit happiness and wellbeing. Carrying out tasks and activities that provide you with opportunities to exercise your strengths are sure to make you feel good and give you more flow experiences. Consciously using these strengths will move you away from engaging in passive activities so frequently (eg watching television).

In this article I will talk about the strengths which make up the virtue ‘courage’: bravery, persistence, authenticity and vitality. Seligman suggests that for happiness we use those strengths which are our signature strengths. To discover your signature strengths, I suggest you visit the Authentic Happiness website and take the VIA survey. There is a feel good factor in working with our strengths. However you may have something you want to nurture. As such I offer a tip to enhance each strength.

Bravery

Bravery is about facing a danger, despite misgivings. Such bravery can be physical, moral or psychological. It is easy to think of physical courage as a form of bravery, yet having moral courage is also important. Here a person may stand up for what they believe in, knowing that they may cause upset or opposition. Bravery can help us develop our other strengths and reach our goals. Bravery is one of the strengths researchers have identified being important to recovery of life satisfaction after illness.

Tip: Look at the things that are getting in the way of you achieving your goal. Tackle them one at a time. As you face your fears and adapt, you will wonder why you were so afraid.

Persistence

A person with this strength will persevere to achieve whatever it is they are striving for. They will work hard to reach their goals and will tackle obstacles as they come their way. It is not about being a perfectionist and such goals are realistic. Importantly, such people are personally motivated and do not need extrinsic rewards (money, prizes etc) to help them achieve. In fact research suggests such motivators do little to help us persevere over the long term.

Tip: List all the things that you have started but not finished. Decide if you should discard them forever or if you want to finish them. For those you want to finish, work on one at a time until you get them finished.

Authenticity

An authentic person lives a genuine and honest life and is true to themselves. As such, their behaviour will match their values. They do not say one thing then do something else. Having this strength means a person will have good self-awareness which in turn makes them more open to change. People like authenticity in others and evidence from research supports this notion.

Tip: Try not to go with the crowd when an opinion is being shared that differs from yours. Be honest with yourself and with your group and tell them what you really think.

Vitality

Having this strength means a person approaches life with zest, passion and enthusiasm. Such people look forward to their day. There are no half measures with these people. Furthermore, such people inspire others and help boost their levels of vitality. This may be one of your strengths if you do not depend on chemical substances to get your energy. Research has shown a high correlation between vitality and happiness.

Tip: Exercise and rest will boost your energy levels, so sleep well and exercise regularly.

Achieving anything in this life depends upon our ability to concentrate. With television, video games and the mass media, we have lost this art to a large extent and many people now find it extremely difficult to concentrate for even the briefest of periods.

By learning the art of concentration, one may surpass all your wildest dreams in a material, intellectual and even spiritual sense. The great sages of old frequently talked at length about the awesome power of the ability to focus the mind. In many mystery schools this is the first thing one learns.

I will, here, attempt to introduce the basics of concentration. There is much more to be found on the web, however the information contained in this article can be of great value to the student wishing to acquire this skill.

The most basic preliminary of concentration is the ability to choose an object of focus, i.e. something to concentrate on. Without this, concentration is impossible. That some-thing can be anything for practice sessions, yet to achieve greatest results it is better to choose a subject deemed worthy of your attention.

In this world of duality that which we bring to the fore must also be accompanied by its antithesis. Thus, in any attempt at concentration, the mind will naturally throw up that which would deviate from this. Plainly said, when you try to concentrate, the mind will automatically try to distract you. Therefore, the first step towards concentration is to counter this effect. The things that vie for your attention and distract you while concentrating, need to be addressed. The key is to set them aside for later and to maintain your current focus.

To help achieve this, one should set a specific time, or several times, each day, when you allow your mind to deal with the things you have previously set aside. It is also an excellent idea to set a specific time to let your mind just wander as it pleases. By sticking to these appointments, whenever something other than your object of concentration pops into your mind whilst attempting to concentrate, you simply acknowledge it and make a note, either mentally or on paper, that you will deal with it at the set time. Then permit the extraneous thought to pass without judgment on yourself for loosing focus and then gently bring your mind back to the subject in hand.

Put very simply, that is all there is to it. One has to merely practice this on a daily basis; each time gradually increasing the length of time you maintain concentration until you are able to focus on anything you desire for any required length of time.

Having said that, as with anything in this world, the reality is a little more complex. We have, for example, different concentration spans for different things. This is clearly seen when one considers that a teenager may easily concentrate for many hours surfing the net or watching television or playing video games, yet ask that same teenager to spend twenty minutes completing their homework or revising for a school test and we see a whole different story.

Einstein effectively demonstrated this when he said:

“When a man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. But let him sit on a hot stove for a minute and it’s longer than any hour. That’s relativity.”

I shall conclude this introduction on concentration with a brief summary of the steps one should take to build the faculty of concentration.

Always keep a pen and paper handy to note down any extraneous thoughts that cross your mind. That way they get out of your head and onto the paper where you are unlikely to forget them.

Set yourself goals for each period of activity that you wish to concentrate on. This could be a certain amount of pages to read of a book or a certain number of calls to make etc.

Try to design adequate rewards for attaining the above goals. (As a tip, use the things that are distracting you as goals. For example, if you would rather watch TV than study then set a certain amount of TV as your reward).

Take frequent short rests. Endeavor to do something different and in a different place, such as take a short walk.

Begin with short periods of concentration and gradually build up the length.

Plan the length of your activity by what you want to accomplish, not by how many minutes you will work for. Nothing kills concentration like the clock!