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Self awareness involves being conscious of who you are and how you will react in certain situations – but it’s also more than that.

What is Self Awareness

Self awareness is achieved by reflecting on your intentions and your actions. It is being aware of your own emotions and how to channel them in order to achieve what you want from life. So many of us re-act to life. Awareness of our selves enables us to be pro-active and therefore more in control of our life course. Self awareness stems from reflection, on trying to understand what we do and how we might do it differently to achieve greater success.

Self awareness involves self knowledge when we know ourselves we learn to trust ourselves and rely on our own judgment rather than the judgment of others.

How Do We Develop Self Awareness

One way of achieving self awareness is to take the time to think things through. So often in today’s world everything carries on at such a pace that it is much easier to say I haven’t the time or I can’t be bothered. If we stop to reflect on things we recognize that it is not time that is the problem but the way we view it and use it. The problem is that we get so caught up in the everyday happenings of our lives that we just don’t take the time to reflect.

When you reflect you look back over the happenings of your life in an attempt to discover how you have become the person you are. Unless we develop self awareness then we cannot change things and develop our full potential. Carl Rogers, who developed person centred counseling believed that everyone had within themselves the means to develop their full potential but in order to do that they had to develop a positive self concept.

We develop a positive understanding of who we are by doing things that we are happy with or successful at. Experience teaches us that when we do things that give pleasure not just to ourselves but to others then we are less stressed and happier. It makes us feel not only that what we are doing is worthwhile but that we ourselves are worthwhile. Part of self awareness is a recognition of the intrinsic value not just of ourselves but of others.

Techniques For Greater Self Awareness

We have already discussed the importance of reflection to becoming self aware – but there are other things that we can do to develop this quality in ourselves. In the East there is a greater recognition of the quality of self awareness and this is often achieved through the practice of yoga and meditation. Buddhist monks for example have to learn to meditate to develop a taste for silence.

Meditation comes in many forms. Some forms of meditation rely on the reciting of a mantra or sacred phrase. Christians, Muslims and Jews also recognize the benefits of meditation and contemplation and how this leads to greater self knowledge. A more recent tool in developing self awareness is cognitive therapy where we take greater control over out thinking processes and try to correct thoughts that are erroneous.

Finally, rediscover what is important to you. One way of doing this is to keep a journal. Many more people are now recognizing the benefits of journaling. Here you can record your thoughts, chart your progress and decide what you see as important. When you decide what is important in your life then you have an idea of what you value. Knowing what you value in life is a vital tool in self awareness and success. When we know what our values are, then it is much easier to chart a path in life that adds to our personal growth and happiness.

The Benefits of Self Awareness

When you become self aware you grow as a person. You develop self-acceptance and this in turn makes you more accepting of others. You become more self reliant and self motivated. These are the qualities that help you to continue growing as a person and to be successful in your chosen field.

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If you find yourself feeling like you’re “in a rut” and not appreciating yourself as much as you should, there are simple changes you can make to improve self-confidence and take charge of your life again. Confidence affects every area of life, from relationships to the workplace. And improving your self-confidence will always have a beneficial effect on both your relationships with others, and your ability to handle the little ups and downs that life can throw at us from time to time.

As a personal development coach, I have worked with many individuals to increase self-esteem and self-acceptance. The following 10 tips have proven time and again to improve self-confidence for a wide variety of people.

1. Clothes Make the Man and Woman. Yes, it’s an old cliche’, but that doesn’t make it any less true. When we dress confidently, we feel confident. Try this experiment: for one week, dress like the person you want to be, NOT the person you think you are. This one is simple change can dramatically improve self-confidence.

2. Stop Trying so Hard. Improving confidence should not be about struggling. Give up trying to be a perfectionist, and give yourself permission to be a human being who will naturally make mistakes sometimes. A sure-fire way to feel inferior is to set the bar too high in every area of your life. Cut yourself some slack — you deserve it.

3. Focus Your Attention Outward. Lack of confidence often causes people to focus an inordinate amount of attention inward, on the “self.” Make it a point to focus more attention on others than you do on yourself. Remember, confident people focus outward — insecure people focus inward.

4. Avoid Energy Vampires. All of us know someone who seems to “suck the energy” out of a room just by entering. Give yourself permission to minimize contact with these people. Don’t hate them or judge them in any way. Just recognize that they do not improve the quality of your life, and minimize your connection with them.

5. Take a Chance. Try something new and different that you may have been apprehensive about in the past. Enroll in an adult education class, or join a book club, gym, bowling league or other social pastime. Shake up your life a little bit. The change will do you good, and your self-confidence will improve.

6. Be a Giver. There is an old proverb that says “you only get what you give.” With that in mind, start giving what you want to receive in life. Make other people feel as confident and worthwhile as you can. By helping to build up confident feelings in others, you are sure to get back the same thing. Call it karma or what ever you like — it always works.

7. Practice Forgiveness. Many people are very hard on themselves because, deep down, they have not forgiven themselves for something in their past. If you’re clinging to some failure or transgression from the past, recognize that you are doing it and then forgive yourself completely for whatever it was. Likewise, if there is someone else in your life you need to forgive, make it a point to do so. NOT for their sake — but for yours. When we forgive, we purify our heart and start anew.

8. Affirmations: Ask Yourself the Right Questions. Some people repeat affirmations such as “I am self confident,” which is fine, but you can improve your affirmation results by using leading questions such as, “why am I so confident?” The subconscious mind operates in a very simple manner. When you ask it a question like this, it will immediately go to work looking for the answer, and it will report back to you all of the ways you already are confident.

9. “Model” Other Confident People. One way to improve self-confidence is to model the behavior of people whom you consider to be supremely confident. If you can befriend a very confident person, that’s great. But if not, just find an actor or other celebrity who is confidence personified, and study their behavior. Do this several times a week, and some of their confident mannerisms are bound to rub off on you.

10. Practice Gratitude. A grateful mind is a peaceful mind, and a peaceful mind radiates confidence. Practice making a daily gratitude list, and particularly focus on different aspects of yourself that you appreciate. Maybe you are a great swimmer, or good at math, or really strong, or a good dancer, or have an unusual sense of humor, or are good at design, or a great singer, or a really good friend, or any number of other positive attributes. Look for what is great about you, and then be grateful you have those qualities. Appreciating your good qualities will improve self-confidence, and help you develop the kind of positive self-image that is crucial to success in life.